Women’s Leadership Podcast And Executive Coaching

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question may be, why should you bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there is a true injunction at the bottom of it. It’s not some casual self-help doctrine. It is that if you don’t arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you today, and you could say, well, I don’t care about that, but that’s actually not correct. You actually do care about that because if you are in pain, you may care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it is very rare that you can find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this form of pain is one of those things that brings the notion that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It is something like, look around for something which disturbs you and see if you can fix it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do it in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room like a room, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I must do?

And you need to ask yourself that, right? It’s not a command. It’s like a genuine question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, like there is a heap of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there would be a fantastic thing. And you know, you haven’t, there is some rubbish behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be marginally better if it was somewhat less dusty and the cables, were not all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to consider the expanse where you exist at that moment, there will be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it that you could just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you’re coming to see me for psychotherapy, this easiest thing for us to do first would just be for you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to fix the things you repeat daily, because people usually think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through daily. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You’ve figured out right away. So a hundred alterations to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less crap and there is a great deal less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps that you step into. And so that is in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and as soon as you’re acting that out, then you can extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself itself and begin fixing up the things which are a part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you might say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there is this man who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for a decade. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be useful if you could repair it, but you, have not got a clue about how to repair that. You just walk around that and go find something that you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it is very likely that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it is you right then and there, which should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you don’t walk up to a helicopter which isn’t working and just start tinkering away with it. You need to stay in your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will just pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your head is a very strange thing. As soon as you give it a title, a real aim, it’ll reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That’s actually how you see to begin with. And so in case you set it a job, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, which is why you must bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you have to get them in your body. So you’re acting consistently. You have to be real about the aim, but as soon as you aim, the world will reconfigure itself around that goal, which is very strange. And it’s, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of that, you have all seen this video where you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and don’t see it.

It is like, you know, in case you thought about that experiment for around five years, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you can get one thing through your head and as a result of even being in university, that would be a great one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to reduce everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there is a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anything, even that particular phrase too much, you want to bind it together with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it’s still a great thing to ask.