Tailored Leadership Coaching

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question might be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there is a true injunction at the base of it. It is not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you don’t arrange yourself properly, you’ll pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you now, and you may say, well, I don’t care about that, but that is actually not correct. You truly do care about that because if you’re in pain, you may care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it is very rare that you can find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this sort of pain is one of the things that brings the notion that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question may be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to that, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It’s something like, look around for something that bothers you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do it in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a room, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I must do?

And you have to ask yourself that, right? It is not a command. It is like a real question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, like there’s a heap of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there would be a good thing. And you know, you have not, there’s some crap behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be marginally better if it was a little less dusty and the cables, weren’t all tangled up the same way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to think about the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it that you could just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you were coming to see me for childbirth, this simplest thing for us to do would just be to get you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say begin where you are able to start.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, that you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat daily, because people usually think of those as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you’ve got your routines that you go through every day. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they’re mundane. I don’t have to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You’ve figured out right away. So a hundred alterations to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less rubbish and there is a great deal less crap around it.

A good deal fewer traps for you to step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and as soon as you’re acting out that, then you can extend what you’re willing to consider yourself and begin fixing up the things which are part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you might say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there’s this man who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for a decade. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, have not got a clue about how to fix that. You simply walk around that and go find something that you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it is very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it’s you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter which is not working and just start tinkering away with it. You have to stay within your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the idea of the room because you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I will make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your head is a very strange thing. As soon as you give it a name, a genuine aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with this goal. That is actually how you see to begin with. And so in case you set it a job, especially you have to be real about it, and that’s why you must bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you have to get them in your body. So you are acting consistently. You’ve got to be real about the aim, but as soon as you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself about that goal, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video where you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and don’t see it.

It is like, you know, in case you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you can get one thing through your mind and as a consequence of even being in university, that would be a good one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the right thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to reduce everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there is a random element to being that is for sure. But, and so you don’t need to take anythingthat specific phrase too far, you need to bind it with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it’s still a great thing to ask.