Leadership Coaching Jo Saxton

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question may be, why should you bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you need to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there’s a real injunction at the bottom of it. It is not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It’s that if you don’t organize yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you now, and you may say, well, I don’t care about that, but that’s actually not correct. You actually do care about that because if you are in pain, you may care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it’s very rare that you can find somebody who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this form of pain is one of the things that brings the notion that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the reply to this, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It is something like, look around for something that bothers you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do it in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room like a space, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I must do?

And you have to ask yourself that, right? It’s not a command. It’s like a real question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, like there’s a stack of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there are a good thing. And you know, you haven’t, there is some rubbish behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the space would be marginally better if it was somewhat less dusty and the wires, weren’t all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you let yourself just to consider the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there will be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it that you can just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you were coming to see me for childbirth, this simplest thing for us to do first would just be for you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you can start.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, that you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a lot different. Now, I often tell people to fix the things you repeat daily, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through daily. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do every day. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out right away. So a hundred alterations to your wider domain of being, and there’s a lot less rubbish and there is a lot less crap around it.

A good deal fewer traps that you step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and once you’re acting that out, then it is possible to extend what you’re willing to consider yourself itself and begin fixing up the things which are a part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you don’t know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there is this guy who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for 10 years. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, have not got a clue about how to repair that. You simply walk around that and go find something that you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it’s very probable that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it’s you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter which isn’t working and just start tinkering away with it. You need to stay within your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will just pop up like mad. And it is partly because your head is a really strange thing. The moment you give it a title, a real aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That is really how you see to begin with. And so in case you set it a task, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, which is why you must bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you must get them in your body. So you’re acting consistently. You’ve got to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself about that aim, which is extremely strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of that, you have all seen this video where you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and do not see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the ideal amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you’re able to get one thing through your mind and as a result of even being in university, that would be a good one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative way, one thing to ask is, are you planning at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to reduce everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there’s a random element to being that is for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anythingthat particular phrase too far, you need to bind it together with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it’s still a terrific thing to ask.